Happy National Llama Day

Today is National Llama Day, which makes it the perfect moment to clear up one of the most pressing mysteries of modern life:

How do you actually tell llamas and alpacas apart?

Online photos would have you believe alpacas are perpetual fluffballs floating around in a cloud of innocence. Real farm life says otherwise — especially right after shearing, when alpacas look less like plush toys and more like… well… polite, surprised noodles.

So, let’s break it down — scientifically, of course.

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🦙 1. Llamas Look Like They Know Where You Misplaced Your Keys

Llamas have long, distinguished faces that radiate competence.

They stand tall (sometimes very tall), with an expression that says:

• “I run morning meetings.”

• “I understand spreadsheets.”

• “I am patient, but also aware you’re not.”

If an animal looks like it could supervise a barn renovation, it’s probably a llama.

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🧸 2. Alpacas Usually Look Fluffy… Unless They’ve Just Been Sheared

Alpacas online: soft, round, plush cinnamon rolls with eyes.

Alpacas at the farm in real life, post-shearing: The embodiment of “I wasn’t ready for this haircut.”

They transform into:

• Dignified Q-tips

• Long-necked marshmallows on diet mode

• Sentient pipe cleaners

• Victorian children wearing turtlenecks

Still adorable — just not the level of fluffy Pinterest promised.

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🦙 3. Llamas Hum Like They’re Judging You. Alpacas Squeak Like They Forgot Their Password.

Llamas emit a deep, thoughtful hum. Alpacas make tiny “mmpf?” noises, as if their internal software is rebooting.

Both sounds are charming. Only one suggests they’re also internally writing employee evaluations.

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🧩 4. Check the Ears: Llamas Use Punctuation, Alpacas Use Exclamation Marks

Llama ears = long, curved bananas.
They look like walking punctuation marks.

Alpaca ears = short, pointy, upright.

One says, “Hmm?”
The other says, “Hi!!”

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🛡️ 5. Llamas Protect the Herd. Alpacas Cheer From the Sidelines.

Llamas have centuries of guarding instinct. If something suspicious approaches, the llama steps forward like a security officer.

The alpacas step back and quietly eat snacks. It’s an ecosystem of balance and mutual respect.

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🐾 6. Watch Them Walk: Llamas Stride, Alpacas Bounce

A llama’s walk says: “I have leadership responsibilities.”

An alpaca’s walk says: “I am whimsical caffeine energy in animal form.”

Sheared or not, this rule holds steady.

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🌟 Bonus: One Llama Snuck Into My Alpaca Coloring Book

This is relevant. Somewhere in my alpaca coloring book, one extremely confident llama has infiltrated the herd.

He knows he stands out.
The alpacas know he stands out.
But he is unbothered.

If you find him, give him a wink from me.

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Happy Llama Day!

Celebrate responsibly, offer snacks generously, and remember:

If it looks like it’s balancing your checkbook, it’s a llama.
If it looks like a plush toy who just got an unexpected summer haircut, it’s an alpaca.